Redo

You can't redo life. You just have to look at where you've been and decide to change. Basically, you have to begin again. I am beginning again. The stress and pressure to lose weight is a defeating battle and I'm just hurting myself. I have decided to begin again. Start fresh. New perspective and goal...pressing onto the finish line, ONE STEP AT A TIME!!!!

Goal: 20% by June 1st.

Plan: Balanced meals, exercise 3-4 times a week.

Why do I want to eat balanced meals?

I want to eat balanced meals so I can feel full and satisfied. So I can get proper nutrition and become a healthier person inside and out.

Why do I want to workout 3-4 times a week?

I want to workout 3-4 times each week because I want to look good in a pair of shorts; because I want to not jiggle when I walk; because I want to look toned not just slim; because I want to hike this summer and not pass out; because I want to not feel guilty when I eat a piece of chocolate cake.

Day 11

I feel huge. I don't know why. I just feel gross. Maybe because I havn't been eating well. Maybe it's because I'm not seeing the results of my exercise. I don't know. All I know is, I hate feeling this way (it brings back PAINFUL memories) and it needs to GO AWAY.

Day 8

It's HOT today! It feels so good outside. I love that I can just slip into a cotton skirt, little light empire waist top, let my hair down (all wavy!!) and just walk around with bare feet. It feels so good to just hang out and eat an ice cream (skinny cow..yes!) sandwich and NOT CARE. It feels so great to be where I am at. I love this new bod. It's fabulous. I really want to workout today.

Day Seven

OOO, today was difficult. Although I DID avoid all donuts at church. I ate way off program and didn't work out. It's been crazy today. Tommorow, I'm TOTALLY back on top of things.

Day Six

I really hurt my upper back with those shoulder exercises. I was out of commition for today's workout. Just wasn't up for it. I've eaten all crazy today. Too much fruit and pudding, not enough protien. I've been hungry all day! Tommorow will be better, I'm sure. :)

Day Five

No workout today, my BUTT HURTS LIKE CRAZY! Ah! I feel like someone hit me with a hammer. It's a good pain though. Ummm, can anyone say "BATHING SUIT!" yes. The food thing is giving me trouble. I'm not doing terrible by any means, I'm just hungry all the time. That shouldn't happen. I'm loving the challenge though. It's lovely.

Day Four

I don't know if I would consider "exercise" fun. It shouldn't be right?! I mean, that's the sterotype. Cardio= KILL ME NOW...weight training= BREAK MY ARMS OFF ALREADY....right?! Well, hip hop classes, ballet, jazzercise with friends, running up and down the beach, kyaking, rocking out to Sean Paul in your bedroom (secretly perfecting your Beyonce booty shake)...now that's FUN! I love it. The Self-Challenge is going wonderfully. I've worked out more during the last week then I have in months. Which is sad because it's not that much, cumulatively speaking. I guess the truth is, I'm really infatuated with the idea of wearing a bathing suit this summer. I'm really in-love with the idea that I could wear a two piece and NOT cringe behind a towel. I'm siked that this summer in Czech I'm going to hike up that mountain and feel LESS like jumping of the edge just to give my legs and lungs some relief.
Yes. I'm dedicated to this goal: No excess hanging out of my bathing suit. WOO HOO! Walking over that bridge in Yosemite (towards my family I only see twice a year) proudly. That's gonna feel amazing.

I'VE GOTTA KEEP IT UP!!! Goal: Cardio 3x a week (at least 30 min.), strength training 3x a week (at least 25 min.)...if I'm consistent, it's gonna happen. WHO GIVES A CARE IF IT'S TAKES ANOTHER YEAR! AHHH! :) yes.